Reliance

I always tend to rely on others too much despite knwing tht ultimately the only person who wld stick by me no matter what happens is myself. If only I cld be more self-reliant. But sadly I'm not independent at all. I need someone to care of at all times. I want to be able to curl up and cry to someone whn I'm feeling unwell. I want to share with someone any joy tht I get. I just really need a person to be ard me. I'm such a weak girl that I'm pretty ashamed of myself.

As compared, I think my mom is a much stringer individual n I shld rlly learn frm her. She might rely on my dad on a lot things, but whn it comes to perserverence, I think many wldnt be able to hold it up to her.

And then comes Suri. (Surprise,, surprise, he's the main reason for this entry.) Being the dependent person that I am, I need so much attention frm him. But anyone who knows him or has heard of me talking abt him wld knw tht he's a rlly busy man coping with work and sch, and earning his own pocket money, and stuff like tht. So what right do I have to take so much of his time?

Recently I've been throwing my temper at him over pretty minor things and I feel so bad abt it. I need to be much stronger than this, but it's do hard. Sigh!

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